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Once I was 22, I had a boss who taught me to crave rejection. At the moment, I used to be in a gross sales position and had shared along with her that I felt all I ever heard was the phrase “no.”
The next month, she ran a contest to see who may hear “no” essentially the most. And sure certainly, I used to be the victor. A lot good got here from that have. I noticed that rejection is part of gross sales, and it is also part of life. I realized that extremely profitable folks know this and are not miffed after they’re instructed no. In truth, they embrace rejection and even study from it.
Profitable folks use rejection to get stronger. Nonetheless, many individuals do not feel this manner about rejection. For those who’re struggling to be ok with being rejected, listed below are 4 steps you’ll be able to take to fully rewire your mind.
Associated: 5 Methods to Flip Rejection Into Resilience
1. Do not take it personally
Usually, we battle with rejection as a result of we really feel it is private. However rejection often is not private.
When rejected, it is simple to marvel what the rejection says about us. However typically, rejection does not say something about us. As an alternative, it says one thing concerning the different particular person. Incessantly, we ignore or low cost the explanations we’re given for the rejection. As an alternative, we search for another excuse (the true purpose). Normally, another excuse does not exist.
If somebody says they do not need the services or products we’re promoting as a result of they cannot afford it at the moment, they often imply it. If somebody says they cannot attend the occasion we invited them to as a result of they’re too busy, they often imply it. Spending time beating ourselves up and questioning what the rejection actually says about us and the way likable we’re is usually an incredible waste of time. After we belief the explanations we’re given for the rejection, we will transfer on and strike out once more a lot sooner.
2. Get enthusiastic about being rejected
Rejection often does not really feel good. For a lot of, that is why it is exhausting to think about what (if any) good can (and can) come from it.
Bear in mind: Ache is inevitable, however struggling is optionally available. Acknowledge that you’ve a alternative in how you’re feeling about rejection. No matter story you inform your self about rejection comes from you. It is as much as you to interpret the knowledge that exists in your world. You will have the ability to flip the script, change the narrative and inform your self a distinct story.
You’ll be able to select to view rejection as a very good factor — it means you set your self on the market, requested a troublesome query and exuded braveness. It means you bought out of your consolation zone, which all the time helps us develop and evolve. It means you bought to apply a talent (the talent of asking, influencing or promoting). That apply will assist you develop thicker pores and skin and hone your craft, making you stronger and harder. With that in thoughts, you’ll be able to select to view rejection as a very good factor.
Associated: The way to Overcome Rejection and Transfer Ahead With Your Large Objectives
3. Ask why — and study from it
Most individuals really feel ache when rejected. After we expertise any type of ache, our first response is usually flight or struggle. We both stroll away, as shortly as we will, or we double down and argue. On the subject of rejection, neither strategy works properly.
Here is what does: Participating the one who rejected you from a spot of true curiosity. Questions reminiscent of: “What was the most important consider your determination?” or “What, if something, would’ve made you say sure?” or “What may I provide or do subsequent time that may excite or curiosity you extra?”
These questions are nice instruments that can assist you study from rejection. Maybe you can provide suggestions to your boss that your product’s value level is not interesting or the advantages aren’t assembly market demand. You would possibly study {that a} barely altered services or products would’ve garnered a sure, and maybe you’ll be able to negotiate an exception out of your firm that permits you to return and provide the shopper what they really need.
From time to time, there’s something you would’ve completed or mentioned in a different way that may’ve been persuasive. Getting details about easy methods to proceed extra successfully subsequent time is a win. With that mindset in thoughts, rejection is definitely a very good factor — it helps you enhance.
4. Know that issues can change
Do not forget that most issues in life aren’t everlasting and folks’s conditions can change dramatically from one 12 months to the following (and even one month to the following). Simply because somebody turned you down as soon as doesn’t suggest they will flip you down each time.
Ask permission to reconnect or contact base once more later. Possibly your pal cannot make time to see you this month, however they will be capable to subsequent month. Maybe the shopper you have been attempting to signal all 12 months might be in a distinct monetary scenario subsequent 12 months. Acknowledge now merely won’t be the proper time for no matter you are proposing, and whereas that is okay, it could not all the time be the case.
Associated: 4 Methods to Deal with and Overcome Your Concern of Rejection
5. Regulate your technique
After you get sufficient data to study following a rejection, you get to make use of what I name PDCA — plan, do, examine and modify.
As soon as you have been rejected and know why, you’ll be able to modify your technique. You would possibly study that making calls at lunch time is not efficient as a result of nobody solutions the cellphone. You would possibly study you have been focusing on the fallacious demographic and wish to select completely different prospects. You would possibly study prospecting on the weekdays is not as efficient as prospecting on weekends.
Rejection, if used appropriately, will be a superb trainer as a result of it will probably information us to make adjustments to what we do and the way we do it. You would possibly determine to start out frequenting neighborhood occasions or be part of a networking group to be extra profitable. Ultimately, if being rejected causes you to do one thing new and completely different, that is one other win.
Having a wholesome, sturdy relationship with rejection is a real recreation changer. For those who undertake these 5 philosophies on rejection, you will discover rejection is not practically as painful because it as soon as was. You would possibly even start to look ahead to rejection.
